I piss a lot. Sometimes, I poop.
If you're not into awkward, fat, sometimes funny, blue haired, oversharing stoners who don't shave or wear a bra, keep scrolling
Butt, if that's your bag, I'll see you right back here regularly, for daily Watersports clips (up to $5), Occasional toilet shitting ($10), and full length feeder/hydration clips ($7)
Twitter: @HerEllaness | Instagram: HerEllaness | Manyvids: Her-Ellaness
People always seem to think that I'm joking when they ask me what I'd like for Mother's Day, and my response is that I'd like to shit in peace.
Today, I shit in a public bathroom just to have a few moments to myself.
After you buy my clip for $10. You can refund my Eggs Benedict & coffee breakfast $30, buy me wet wipes $5, and tip me generously on top of that rounding it up to a nice, round $200.
Once you've done all that, I give you permission to call me: Mother
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A no tp pee pee
Why is it I'm always the one left with the empty toilet paper rolls? And one is that always when I really, really, really, really got to go?
God damn it, there's no toilet paper anywhere. I guess that means I'm gonna have to use kleenex. I hate my life right now.
It's OK. The quick pee's are easy to clean up, and that's exactly what this is. I guess it's time to go shopping for more.
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So, I got back on hook-up apps because I'm a whore and I need to get laid. This chick, I tell you.. amazing, fantastic, flexible, and fun.. I didn't realize how many bruises she left on my thighs until this clip.
I forgot to pee before I left her place, so I feel like my bladder might actually explode.. When I finally manage to sit down on the toilet, my body is so tense it takes a moment for it to actually realize that it is indeed okay to finally take the long and overdue piss it so desperately needs.
Finally, as the urine leaves my body, it's like time stands still.. and for 50 plus seconds, nothing else exists.. just the sound and feel of sweet relief. Note to future self.. always pee before you leave..
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I look sexy as fuck, and everything that could go wrong, did go wrong. So, of course, this piss is a beautiful disaster. I did everything except fall over. I guess that's what happens when you pee outdoors for your first time on camera.
I went to a nearby park with a small body of water where I could sit and have a drink or two on a bench under some beautiful apple trees, while I watch people walk their dogs as I enjoy the sunset. Unfortunately for me, I forgot that what goes in must come out, and there were no public bathrooms, so in the Bush I went.
Honestly, I panicked, so I have no idea how long I peed for I didn't bother counting, I just tried not to piss on too much of my belongings as I concentrated on also not falling over.. and did not look forward to how invasive the next tick check is going to be.
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I'm feeling like a princess in my black housecoat and long black princess dress today. Slowly unpeeling from the straps of the robe, untangling myself and sliding the soft fabric down my shoulders before hanging it up safely out of the way.
Sitting down preparing myself for a solid shit with a sloppy outside because I had to hold it in for a while before I could finally get to a toilet. You can tell I'm dehydrated, by that short, sad excuse for a piss that only lasted what, 5 seconds? I must remember to hydrate.
Once the pushing and plopping are done, I'm feeling cheeky, so I decide to let you check my asshole before & after I wipe.
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Okay. So I know that this is the 2nd day in a row where I've posted a piss clip that's less than 20 seconds long, but I'm literally in a fast food joint that I've never been in before, so obviously I had to christen the place.
I wonder if saying their name in the title would have them sponsor me or have the video taken down?
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Two public bathroom pees
I know I said I wouldn't post short piss clips, but the two combine are over 20 seconds of piss and they are in one of my favorite public bathrooms.
Also, on the second one, you get to watch me piss like in the good old days.. when that was the only angle I used.. and you hear another person leaving, too, which like.. never happens.
So enjoy the clip despite the lower quality streams, it means I'm getting back to work.
I'll see you tomorrow in a different public bathroom.
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Changing a liner. I went to a friend's place & wouldn't you know it? He's such a gentleman that he leaves sanitary products under his sink for guests, which is a good thing too, because after the laughter we had just shared, I needed to pee & change my liner.
I hover over the toilet, feeling the warm, wet piss along my thighs, dripping out of my public hair, I knew it was time to change the urine catcher in my panties. Looking back as I'm editing, I'm kinda mad at myself for not keeping it & selling it to you. It even had a stray public hair weaving it's way around the pad.
Make up for my lack of foresight by tipping me how much you'd be willing to pay me for a fresh pantyliner so I can feel better about the wasted money.. and get an average of what you horny fucks would pay for one when I decide to start selling them.
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I've been so busy these days I haven't had a moment to myself, but a bunch of pee whores have been resubbing awaiting their next piss clip, even in my absence. Money notifications make me hot. That's the kind of addiction to me I stand for.
I want to invest in an STP device, a chamber pot, and a few other watersports accessories, and since I'm making an effort to give you what you want, it's time to open your wallets and give me what I want.
Look at me! I'm sitting on public toilets for fuck sakes! I deserve compensation for that alone! Never mind filming it for you piss addicted horny fuckers.
Count how long the stream lasts for a tip the seconds in dollars to kick off my shopping spree.
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Peel-a-part pee. Part of Perimenopause is accepting that sometimes holding it in will cause a hot flash. I could feel my butt cheeks prying apart from the sweat, and upon editing, I've realized exactly how visible it was. I'm highly amused.
The way is the chrome light flashes off my cute little butt cheek, really makes for an adorable piss clip if I do say so myself. I motivated to get scheduling again regularly. Now it's just the matter of finding those few moments alone where I can actually do it.
Yay, me for getting it done today!
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A short pee? The pee itself isn't a short one, but I felt short because of the angle. Life has gotten away from me recently, but now I'm making scheduling a priority again, so you will see more of me!
I deserve a pat on the back.. in the form of money.. because nothing motivates a money motivated whore like money..
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I rushed into my new favorite bathroom because of the amount of coffee that I've been drinking. I knew the coffee poop was going to be a messy one, and I didn't want you to miss it.
I turn around, pull my pants down, and go to sit on the toilet, and before my ass, even lands on the seat, you see me, start pissing into the bowl below. I almost didn't make it, did I?
I didn't bother counting how long I was going to piss for because I knew the shit would be worth it anyway. So watch as the mushy shit slides out from between my cheeks, smearing & dripping as it exits my asshole.
And let me know at which point that I sharted if you can see it happen.. That splatter happened somehow.. sometime.. I just happened to miss it.
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A Public Bathroom Derpee. I've got the goofiest grin on my face as I enter a brand new bathroom to pee in. I found a new little hangout in my neighborhood, and they have a public bathroom reserved only for the people in the building.
Every trip to this room will be a risk, and I can't wait.
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Shhhhh, goes the stream. Shhhhh, it goes my lips. Shhhhh, I say with my fingertips. Silently, I slide my sweats off, belly bouncing around, so soft. Next time, I'll pee with the lights off. (just kidding)
Enough of bad poetry, enjoy the 30+ seconds of pee-etry. Tomorrow, I wander the city in search of a new toilet to piss in. I'll see you then
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The way the water flows. With a running faucet in the background, I was concerned about the sound quality of the watersports clip as I set the camera up. I am relieved to hear that the audio picked up beautifully for the 25 seconds of pissing.
Also, with the water flowing, the desperation that comes with needing to pee was at an all-time high. I barely made it to the seat as I sat down. The frantic search for toilet paper had to be cut short because of it. Am I really "gummy" in today's clip? I am feeling really gummy in today's clip.
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Fast piss at a fast food joint. My phone just flashed low battery, the place is crowded, I'm scared, and squeeze the piss out as fast as I can. It's a short but terrifying 16 seconds. Even as I'm editing this, my heart is racing at the very memory of it.
Now that I've moved, I've become more of a risk taker, I like that about me. I'll be happy when I get that little homestead you're funding for me. Let's get me that dream home. You know you want to be a part of elevating my life to having everything I want & more. That's why you keep coming back.
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The last piss. Don't get me wrong, I'm still making watersports clips, I'm just not filming in this bathroom anymore. I no longer live at this location & because of my new life, I'm pissing in more fun locations going forward. Friends, family, public bathrooms, and sometimes even in the very place I lay my head..
My social life has expanded, as have my toilet locations! Some clips will be shorter.. because public places.. but I'll still do what I can to make fun & well hydrated clips🥰 So enjoy this last pee clip on this toilet for nostalgia sake, & let's have even more fun going forward!
I'll see you tomorrow!
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It's the capri shimmy for me. That's what gets me. It's wintertime & I'm running around in capri leggings & ankle socks like I'm a cold weather person. I most definitely am not, I wish I had a summer house in a warmer climate. My people migrated.
Is it so bad that I'd want to go somewhere warmer for the winter? Vacations to warmer locations *sigh* You should pay for a vacation for me. Put me in a nice hotel, with a beautiful bathroom for me to piss in. I deserve to pee on beautiful places.
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Hey! I'm back! Sorry about the hiatus I have recently undergone some changes that prevented me from working. But I've found a renewed desire to take life by the balls and make it my bitch, so it's time to go back to work.
The house is mine, the garden is mine, the tiny house is mine, the knowledge I continue to grow, it's all already mine. And so is your spending balance, because you dream of licking vanilla cupcake saliva off your lips.
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I haven't been eating properly recently so instead of a plop, you get to see the tiniest squirt ever manage to spray the bowl & the seat. Thankfully it's not my toilet to clean as I'm in a hotel. Sorry, to the cleaning staff.
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You think you suffer from main character syndrome? I turn my life into my own personal musical. I mean, aside from the 40+ second long piss, which in itself is melodious.
As a housewife, I need to get my kicks where I can. I change the garbage & for some reason, having the garbage bags in the bottom of the can feels like the best decision ever when I change the garbage which lightens my entire mood, so after I finish switching it out I look at myself in the mirror and break into song.
I'm sorry.. and you're welcome.
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